THE QUACK

HERE'S TO ME, MRS. ROBINSON: IS AGE JUST A NUMBER?

“I’m very into mature women,” he said. I looked behind one shoulder, and then the other, and realised he was talking about me.
 
The night I realised I was seen as a 'mature woman', and a muddled observation about age gaps in relationships.
 
SKIP INTRO: 2:38.
 
Soundtrack and sound effects: Soundstripe.com
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SHOULD MEN PAY FOR THE FIRST DATE?

"The bill was placed between us and the dance began..."
 
This is a muddled observation about one of the most controversial topics in dating. Email me what your thoughts.... mary@thequack.blog
 
 
Music and sound effects: Soundstripe.com.

THE EURO FINAL: THE MUSICAL

...A fan would whack the table in a rhythm, prompting everyone to shout ‘ENGLAND!’  It wasn't exactly Les Misérables, but it did the job.
 
If the day of the Euro Final was a musical...
 
SKIP INTRO: 2:07
 
Song credits: www.Soundstripe.com

WOULD YOU DATE YOU?

We have a list of what we’re looking for, but is anyone looking for us?
 
Another muddled observation by Mary about dating. 
 
(SKIP INTRO 2:12)

BOOBS.

"And perhaps I’m overthinking it, but they seem to stare off in different directions, like the eyes of the Cookie Monster...."
 
A quick look into boobs; the first bra and beyond. 
 
SKIP INTRO 2:40
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Music and sound effects  - www.Soundstripe.com

THE STORY OF MATHS AND ME.

"It was there in that terrapin building with Mr. Marcus and his good hair, that I realised that I hated maths and was also not very good at it."
 
A quick look into my horrid and relatable journey of everyone's least favorite subject - mathematics. 

32 YEARS OF HURT: LIVING WITH FOOTBALL.

"All I want to do is get rid of the ball, so I can go home and resume Polly’s pool party in Polly Pocket land."
 
A witty observation about living with a football-obsessed family, in a football-obsessed land.
 
(SKIP INTRO 2:29)

WHAT'S YOUR WILD STORY?

"We all need to arm ourselves with at least one crazy life story..."
 
An observation about the need to have a wild story to tell...
 
SKIP INTRO 2:21.
 
 

#LIVINGYOURBESTLIFE? WHAT I LEARNT WHEN I MOVED TO AUSTRALIA.

"The problem with moving to Australia was that I had to bring myself with me."
 
The story of when I moved to Australia and the vital life lessons I learnt.
 
Skip Intro 2:44

THE BABY SHOWER AND MY NAGGING EGGS.

"As I ate my plant-based scone, I heard that luring voice coming from an ovary. “You can throw an afternoon tea party too…if you just use one of us."
 
When you're single, 32, and at your friend's baby shower...
 
SKIP INTRO 2:05